Elder

Elder

Eldership: The power that dwells within us all

We all know those moments: When life suddenly feels like a storm that threatens to overwhelm us. A sharp word, an unexpected challenge or a disappointment that hits us right in the heart - and suddenly we are caught up in the chaos. Perhaps we withdraw into ourselves at such moments, trying to shut out the world. Or we explode outwards, letting go of the supposed hurt in the form of anger or defence. And afterwards? We are often left with a stale feeling that makes us feel emptier and more disconnected inside.

This is life without an "elder", without the inner elder that lies dormant deep within us. But what is this Elder anyway? And why should we discover it within us?

1. if the Elder is missing: overload, retreat, attack

Imagine you are facing a difficult situation - perhaps an argument with a loved one. The wounded part of you that feels unseen and unappreciated is stirring inside you. The old feeling of rejection flares up. Instead of remaining confident and calm, an inner voice may come forward and urge you to retreat: "Just go away, it's no use!" Or the inner fighter takes over: "How can you say that? I'm not going to put up with it!"

It is all these voices within us that control us if we have not developed the Elder within us. In psychology, these are called the "inner managers" or "wounded parts". They step in when we feel threatened. Sometimes they protect us, but mostly they leave chaos and an aftertaste of guilt and pain because they are not balanced and only react in extremes. And in these moments we lack guidance, calm, compassion - everything that the Elder represents.

2. with the Elder: Inner wisdom as an anchor and powerful centre of calm

But what does it feel like when this elder is really present? Imagine the same situation: a conflict with someone close to you. But this time you take a step back inside. You feel the pain, the surge of emotions - but it is as if you are watching them lovingly. Instead of reacting, you take a deep breath and allow the feelings to be there without being swept away by them.

All of a sudden you have space. Space to feel without flooding. Space to listen with an open heart, even if the other person's words are harsh. Space to speak without attacking. You feel the warmth of compassion that covers you and the other person. You don't have to control the other person, suppress anything inside you, hide anything. The Elder in you simply perceives without judgement. It is a force that is not rigid, but flexible and soft. An anchor that holds you in place when the storm arises, a centre of calm from which you bring yourself into the world with calm strength.

This kind of serenity doesn't mean that you don't set boundaries. On the contrary: the Elder in you sees what is healthy for you and what is not. He pays attention to the boundaries that show the fulfilment of needs and not the boundaries of socio-cultural customs, patterns and imprints. He acts from a place of clarity and love, without anger, without fear. Instead, he meets the challenges with a deep trust: "I can take care of myself. I can also be there for you. And we'll find a way together, even if it's difficult at the moment."

3. you can develop it: Your Elder is waiting inside you

You might be thinking: "That sounds nice, but how am I supposed to manage that?" The truth is: the Elder is already inside you. Each of us has this indestructible core that cannot be shaken - no matter how much life puts us to the test. But often this core is buried. Instead of living from it, we chase after things on the outside. We hope that someone else will give us the stability we are looking for within ourselves. We expect partners, friends or society to give us the security and love that only the Elder within us can really offer.

But you can learn to develop this inner elder. It takes practice, patience and the will to go through the painful layers. With us, we accompany you on this path: we help you to get back in touch with this core. You will learn how to reach out to yourself when things get difficult instead of judging yourself or looking away. You will experience what real compassion feels like - not only for others, but also for yourself.

It is not about comforting and developing or growing the injured inner children. Without having developed your own inner elder, this will fail. It is your task to develop this elder, you are not dependent on anyone.

Because eldership is not something you find on the outside. It is an attitude, an inner state that you can cultivate. With every conscious breath you take, with every decision to be loving towards yourself instead of criticising yourself, your elder grows. Step by step, it becomes stronger until you no longer have to look for it - because it has become a living part of you.

Conclusion: The Elder - the power that lives within you

Eldership is the indestructible part of us that keeps us stable even in the most stormy moments. It is the part that loves, understands and keeps building bridges, even when it seems hard. Without this inner Elder, we often feel lost, driven by our own emotions and hurts. With it, on the other hand, we experience serenity, trust and a deep connection to ourselves and others.

You can discover and develop this Elder within you - and we will teach you how to do this. Because in the end, it is this inner wisdom that we all long for. It is the safe harbour that we so often seek on the outside, but can only really find within ourselves.